The Ocean Calls

One of my most perfect moments was at Avalon Beach in New Jersey when I was in college.  I was on a Christian retreat with my InterVarsity friends.  We were staying in a beach house in the late fall.  This was the visit to the beach that sparked my love for the ocean in the off season.

One afternoon, I went for a walk to reflect on some difficulties I was going through both emotionally and spiritually.  I was conflicted in my beliefs and my heart had recently been broken.  I found a little rocky retaining wall and sat down.  I was wearing a pair of pale blue cotton pants, rolled to mid-calf, a plain t-shirt, and a warm hooded sweatshirt, unzipped.  I was barefoot, and in my hand I had a small notebook and a pen.

I put my things down, pulled up my legs and hugged them to my body.  It was windy and all I could hear was the crashing of the waves and the wind blowing my hair behind me.  I closed my eyes and felt the ocean with all of my senses.  The smell of the salty air opened my lungs and I was filled with an unbelievable calm.

I began to sing.

I sang a number of different songs that opened my spirit to how I was feeling.  Some spiritual, some not... tears began to stream down my face.  I had found the most perfect place and moment for that time and I was one with the ocean.

Tonight, I had a moment of refreshing clarity similar to what I felt in Avalon all those years ago.  I have had some heavy burdens weighing me down lately.  My emotions were out of control.  I had an anxiety attack earlier today.  The difficulties that I was facing in the moment became more than I could bear.

I opened my heart to a friend and put all of my frustration, confusion, fears and pain out to be seen.  I felt broken at first, but then, in the few short hours that followed, I found that moment of peace and clarity.  My heart felt lighter, my breathing deepened.  My soul felt relieved that I had released something I was holding on to that I needed to let go of for many reasons. As Elsa sang,,,, I let it go.

Tonight, I want to share with you one of the songs I sang in Avalon.  Please remember that I am a mediocre guitar player at best.  There are a LOT of mistakes.  Yes, this is ME singing and playing.  Sorry that you can't see my face, but I was in my pajamas and because I had been crying (due to a swell of overwhelming emotions over the past few days) and my face was a bit puffy.  I didn't want to share that lovely look with ya!

This is a song by a band called Halo.  Thy will be done.  BE KIND, it's not my best work!