Yesterday's perceived successes: Yogurt for breakfast, Salad in the afternoon, Weight Watchers meal for dinner.
Yesterday's perceived failures: Mindless and random attack of candy corn, raspberry shortbread cookies (yes, as good as it sounds), and lack of exercise.
These successes and failures are perceived because I'm not sure how good or bad they were. Yogurt, salad, and diet food are clear enough, but should I be concerned about how much dressing I used or carb contents? Candy and cookies - ok, definitively bad, but I caught myself with the candy corn just as the second piece touched my tongue and thought, "What am I doing?" The cookie... well... they're just really good and my kids and hubs don't like them. What else can I do?
In earlier diet attempts, the key to success was in keeping contraband (sweets, high fat, high carb, etc.) out of the house. With kids, I don't have that luxury. I'm going to have to test my inner strength even more.
On a lighter note: I decided to research Christian weight loss programs. I thought that perhaps the answers could be found in the Bible, since it is God's life lesson book! Every plan I found online bore the same message -- You are a SINNER for being FAT because you are a GLUTTON. One website indicated that the bulk of women in a church family are overweight because the church is the only entity that will accept them as they are. The ideas behind these "plans" involve massive amounts of Christian guilt, fire and brimstone, and the fury of the Father. One book was titled, "You're a big FAT sinner and it's time somebody told you the truth."
I believe that God is patient, kind, loving, and above all, forgiving. I don't know that the BIG FAT SINNER approach is going to be effective for me.
Since I have determined that there is a psychological reason for my obesity that needs to be cured, I have decided to give it to God. Who else can heal the spirit and psyche? I'm not going to follow the GUILT approach, but I am going to pray. A lot.
Can I get an AMEN from the choir??!??
Holy crap! (pun very much intended) I can't believe anyone would ever buy such a book. Seriously... as if we don't beat ourselves up enough already, now we need someone else putting us down too, and doing it on "God's behalf?" UGH!!! That's just infuriating!
ReplyDeleteI think we as a society spend way too much time pointing out the negative (just look at the news!). I think a lot of times we end up defeating ourselves by focusing on the stuff we do wrong instead of what we do right.
You need to pat yourself on the back for the things you did that you're proud of, and don't waste your energy feeling guilty about the other stuff. Just focus on tomorrow and think about the benefits you're getting just from focusing your energy on eating well.
You need to feel good about yourself as you go through this process, or you'll end up defeating yourself! We are our own biggest obstacles to success in this life!
But at any rate, congrats on realizing that the big fat sinner approach isn't for you. You deserve better. You're beautiful as you already are, but wanting to be healthier is always a worthy goal.
The big question is...instead of seeing yourself as flawed and continuing to mess up, do you think you can view yourself as God does... beautiful and getting more so every day? That's how the people who love you view you, and you deserve to see that beauty for yourself too.
Okay, I'm totally hogging comment space now, but it's been a while since we chatted, and I wanted to give you a pep talk! You know I love ya!
Hugs, Jenn @Misadventures in Motherhood
Hey... check out this chick's blog! I just happened upon it today and I thought you'd like it! She's a weight watchers fan too...
ReplyDeleteMisadventures of a Chunky Goddess
I just started following her today. She cracks me up! LOL
I can't remember the name of the HELPFUL Christian diet book I read so many years ago, but I remember what the point was...
ReplyDelete1. You need to learn to eat to live instead of living to eat.
2. You need way less food than you think.
My weightloss breakthrough came when I got past #2. (#1 takes longer, because you MUST focus on what you eat and how much in order to build those better habits.) Imagine my surprise when I ate a Happy Meal at McD's for lunch instead of a super-size Big Mac meal and found that IT WAS ENOUGH!
I measured my cereal and the milk that went on it, and when I was done eating it, I was ok!
A cup of tea without sugar and toast with butter or jelly is PLENTY for breakfast most days!
There is a freedom that comes with this process, but it is a process. Hang in there- You can do it!
Got the Big Fat Sinner booklet, audio book plus the 5 videos for FREE...they had a window wherein they offered it for free and I believe it was God leading me to in His perfect timing.
ReplyDeleteThe book did not make me guilty at all, only the truth that in this aspect of my life, Jesus was not my Lord and I need to repent to overcome this sin.