Thoughts on Cookies

First, my aunt keeps reminding me that it's not a Diet, but a "Lifestyle Change."  I keep reminding her that I'm NOT GIVING UP COOKIES FOREVER!

HA!

Ok, I was doing great, following the 21 Day FIX diet.  My weight loss was slow and steady.

Then I got the FLU.

I didn't eat for nearly 2 weeks and dropped 12 pounds.

I was thrilled.  I lost weight!  Yeah... once I started eating again, it came back.

Since recovering from the flu, I have NOT been 100% on track with the Fix plan.  Why?  I'm still trying to get myself healthy.  I'm still a bit sick!  In fact, I seem to get nauseated every single time I eat and my digestive system is STILL not back to normal.

I gave up cookies for Lent.  You know how much I love my cookies.  If you don't, find the posts about them.  Cookies, especially SUGAR COOKIES are my downfall!  Oh, you blessed Sugar Cookies... Why are you my stumbling block?

LENT is a season of sacrifice.  We spend these days in sacrifice to help us to redirect our attentions toward God and prayer.  So, using my cookie analogy, every time I crave a cookie, I should, instead, say a prayer or do something to refocus that attention on God.

Did you ever notice that when you give something up, you tend to fixate on it even more than you had before?  I love sugar cookies.  I really do.  I could eat them every single day.  But... I know that they are a sabotage to my diet.  I gave them up for lent, now suddenly, I see them EVERYWHERE.  

At work, in the cafe, the pile of cookies seems to be bigger every day.  I look at them, drool a little, and sigh, then I order my salad or sandwich and move along.  At home, once the kids are in bed and my husband heads off to work, I go into the pantry closet looking for a snack and there I see the boxes, bags, and snack packs of cookies... staring at me.  I reach out, touch the packages, sigh, and move along.

It's so hard.   I know it seems like a small thing, a simple cookie, but when you have put this limitation on yourself to avoid the sugar cookie....  suddenly, you just seem to want it even more than you did before. There are plenty of other sweets that I didn't give up.  I'm a sucker for coffee flavored ice cream, or even dulce de leche.  I've never been one to turn down a good piece of chocolate... or a bad one for that matter.  All those options are still on the table, but now, with my restriction, I just want the cookies more and more.

Breakfast cookie with coffee!
Cookies with Lunch!
The 3:00 office hunger pang cookie!
The after dinner, kids want a snack and you have to touch the cookies, cookie.
The late night snack cookie! (These are my favorite)

I find myself looking forward to Easter and plan on having a huge cookie tray of all varieties when the time comes.  That will be a diet CHEAT DAY.

Until then, I do trust my will power.  I do trust that I can avoid the cookies if I absolutely must.  But wow, I never thought it would be so hard.  I look forward with anticipation to the days when sugar cookies will be back on the plate.

So here's a thought, then... going back to dieting and restricting food options in hopes to lose weight:

If cutting out one particular food -- sugar cookies -- makes me want them even more than when they weren't restricted, then wouldn't it make sense that cutting them away from the diet would be bad?  Perhaps they must remain a part of the diet.

Follow me here...  If I tell myself I can have one cookie a day, then it's just -- meh, a cookie.  But if I look at the cookies and say, "No.  You CAN'T have that." I fall into a mini depression (ok, being dramatic) over the loss... The best way to regulate the cookie intake is to allow them.

Example:

Restriction:  You can only have a sugar cookie once a week.
Result:  Longing and desire to have a sugar cookie all week long until the day when I can have it, then, pigging out on a dozen sugar cookies.

Restriction:  You can have a sugar cookie any time you want.
Result:  Hey, I just went the WHOLE weekend without a single cookie!

 I guess I'm saying that I hate putting myself on restriction.  Lent is hard.  Diets are hard.  This "lifestyle change" my aunt speaks of makes me sad because I don't want to give up on things I love.  I want the things I love in my life.  I realize that there is a cost.  There is a price to pay for overindulgence.  A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips.  But life is short!  Do I really want to spend it longing for things that I "shouldn't" want/have?

Ugh.  I don't have an answer.


I suppose this one sounds more like a ramble than anything else.  I just had some thoughts and barfed them out for you.  HA!

Happy Friday everyone!